Holy poop!

So Phoebe had one hideous poop tonight …

One minute Kates, Phoebe and I are watching the Muppets Christmas special. The next minute, Kates is getting Phoebe ready for bed. And the next minute after that Kates is shouting for me to “Come here, quick!”

Inside the door to Phoebe’s room I see Kates holding Phoebe up by the armpits. Phoebe’s entire back side is covered in brown slop.

I got one glance of it and whipped back the other way with my eyes closed and trying to forget the awful sight.

Phoebe had been wearing a sweater over her onesie, So we had no way of knowing the stuff was sloshing up her back and saturating her shirt. She hadn’t made a peep about it.

I got a hold of myself. And went back into Kates’s aid.

By this time, Kates had it all over her hands. It was getting all over Phoebe’s arms and she was practically eating it.

Kates and I gingerly pulled Phoebe’s onesie over her head. We got more of it on the back of her neck and head. And Phoebe burst out crying, now apparently frightened by the mess she’d made for herself.

And, boy, did it smell. Like raunchy cheese.

Kates watered down Phoebe in the bathtub, while I rushed the stained onesie to the washing machine.

Ah, the joys of first-time parenthood. And I thought the flying poop episode was as traumatizing as it would get.

In other Phoebe developments since last week …

She’s now discovered how to clap. Kates and I are enjoying playing a game during which she claps a string of beats, and we try to echo her. She lights up and when she really gets going, we can play the game for several minutes. Fun times!

She’s also rolling over … finally! Now when we put her on her tummy, it barely lasts a couple seconds before she’s landing on her back. … Though, it’s interesting to note that she hardly uses her arms when she rolls. Instead she strains her neck in the direction she wants to go, expecting the weight of her big head to pull her over. Watching it makes me think that she thinks it’s some kind of superpower – like when Hiro Nakamura closes his eyes to time travel, Phoebe bends her neck to roll over.

And she’s now got some friend named “Bob.” … Last week, almost all we heard from her mouth was “Ma-ma. Ma-ma.” Well, this week she’s moved on -- to “Ba. Ba. Ba,” with a “Bob” occasionally mixed in. Thus, Kates and I have begun asking Phoebe where and who this “Bob” person is. We believe it’s the name she’s chosen for her favorite zebra rattle.